每次去北京,工作都是安排得满满的,因为想着家里的她,希望能尽量少在外面,多在家里和她玩,和她一起学习。
由于晚上11:30要给美国那边打电话,忙着在飞机上准备资料,回家就不用工作,可以逗她玩,对飞机餐提不起兴趣。
下了飞机马上赶去上课,下周六公司有活动,为了维持基本的出席率,必需要尽量赶去上课,幸好教授没有超时,下课后归心似箭,赶着回家。
一开门看见她,像大了一号,她正在和婆婆玩得喀喀大笑,我放下行李,洗过手,急不可待的去抱她,她双眼傻傻的盯着我,然后就放声在哭,我记得她一般哭不出眼泪来的,但是昨天她哭得泪眼通红,声嘶力竭,我怕她失控,马上交给婆婆,她立即冷静下来,还在饮泣,十分可怜的!
等到婆婆要离开时,她又哭,像被遗弃,好不容易把她安静下来,又到时间要给美国那边打电话,只好把她交给傭人照顾,又埋头工作,打完电话,她已经入睡。
看着她,肚子空着,心里悬起来!
她会原谅我吗?
我不能原谅自己!
3 comments:
i know---i feel the same way too. don't u feel that doesn't matter how much time u spend w/ her, it is still not enough.
it's difficult to balance everything. that's life. she will understand eventually, but, it's matter if this is really what you want.
it's always not enough.
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